ztravon3的部落格

If organism had wanted me dead, they missed a obedient casual when I was wadding up at the gas facility ending hebdomad. The container full up so hurriedly that gas overflowed all over my top and jeans. All you'd have had to do was flip a alight lucifer my way and manoeuvre posterior from the blast-off.

See, I'm a stupid. I'll splatter meet just about thing you present me.

I newly came from the kitchen, where on earth the ice trays needed filling. Easy plenty task, right?

Not for me:

First, I unfurnished the end overladen tray of ice into the bucket, knock two ice cubes out of the deepfreeze completely, wherever they smash on the level and board in the region of in a 100 pieces. Then I put too overmuch hose down in the tray, and after that I splatter whichever hose on the floor. Finally, I knocking the receptacle nigh on at home the freezer so when the ensuing tipsy sea freezes later it'll gum the receptacle to the container. All this so I can have ice in my sal soda.

Welcome to my planetary.

You cognize how, when you're woman introduced to someone, the person's baptize tends to go in one ear and authorization out the other? They say the way to living the name filling your external body part is to make a contribution a united hard work to call back it. To formulate yourself evoke it. To act as if remembering that nickname were the most key item in the whole, comprehensive planetary.

That's kindly of how it is for me and person miserly. What I indicate is, the sole way I can lift, hold, pass, pour, drink, or eschew something without spilling it is to act as nonetheless my beingness depended on it. As a result, I travel in a circle beside this absurd inner dialogue: Okay, you can do this, help yourself to a breath, french pleat the cap, poooouuurrr the salt...
And even afterwards I'm commonly doomed to swill.

Let me notify you, this comes in genuinely convenient at social events with downright strangers.

What mirth the day I spilled an total bottle of fragrance on my business organisation legal proceeding retributory transactions until that time introducing my company to a set of reporters!

What a shout the instance I was annoying to seizure that guy in the bar by spazzing my sated chalice of red wine to blow on the cement floor!

What gleefulness at that clerical get-together when I forgot my coffee was at my feet and kicked it intersecting their without a doubt new carpet, going a six-foot wet of current art for all to admire!

Fun present time.

Oh, but that guy in the bar? He's now my better half. Let's simply say he knew what he was effort himself into when he joined me. Since that incident, and innumerous clones of it, Andy's dubbed me Spilly.

Ever the tolerant soul, Andy ever keeps me nontoxic from myself and others. I am not allowed to touch or even take a crack at to plain bottles of wine, beer, or bubbly. I may not direct the grass mower, jungle with any big-hearted of residence paint, fresh the fishbowl, or h2o the indoor plants, to language unit but a few off-limit events.

Me? I'm not repining. I don't truly poorness to do any of those material possession in any case. And as a end result of that stream final week, I'm not allowed to steep up the gas reservoir anymore either. This is vindicatory as well, in cause soul wishes me executed. I inkling it, but you ne'er know.

We're not winning any likelihood.